Saturday 9 January 2010

Liar, liar, pants on fire.

The Christmas day plane bomber is in court. This is the man whose nuts combusted while he sat in a plane seat, who was seen by everyone aboard, who was arrested on the plane in his scorched underwear and who was then carted off to be decoked and resprayed for his court appearance.

He is pleading 'not guilty'.

Does anyone think it's possible that they've found a jury who haven't heard about the case?

'Cos I don't.

Although I'd love to hear his version of events. The version where he bases his defence on the spontaneous explosion of his underwear caused by friction with the seat. We'll soon need health warnings on those things.

9 comments:

Sir Henry Morgan said...

He'll claim it was static because he liked wearing nylon girlie panties - hell, anythings better than ending up in an American federal prison.

Hahahahaha ... wv=laceox

Leg-iron said...

Perhaps he'll claim he had two, ah, sticks in his pants and he was just rubbing them together when one burst into flames.

He's also going for the 'I'm a bit mad' defence, even though trying to make his genitals explode would suggest a level of lunacy that would earn him a lifetime in a rubber room anyway.

I'm glad I'm not on that jury. I couldn't keep a straight face.

Leg-iron said...

Perhaps it should read 'he's pleading non-inflammable'...

banned said...

I suppose 'acting on the instructions of the CIA, to test airport security' might be some sort of defence?

Gendeau said...

Can they execute him twice?

Once for the crime and once for wasting court time with a not-guilty plea

P.T. Barnum said...

To be tedious, he declined to enter any plea to the charges. Twas the court who entered the plea as a default. Well, a holy warrior like him is pretty unlikely to recognise the legal legitimacy of the court of Babylon the Great.

Furor Teutonicus said...

I like the way the Fail calls it a "ALLEGED" bomber.

How the FUCK do they THINK he blew his fucking bollocks off then? Static?

Ed P said...

What happened to the "well-dressed Indian gentleman", who accompanied him to the boarding gate, said he did not have a passport, but somehow had him placed on the plane? (CNN news had a video clip of a reliable eye-witness to this astounding event.)
The guy is mostly guilty of being suckered into a CIA-like operation.

Ed P said...

A search for CNN + Kurt Haskell will find the video clip.

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