Tuesday 6 December 2011

It had to 'come'.

Or perhaps not.

No safe level of sex.


I think my laugh gland just burst.

13 comments:

View from the Solent said...

No safe level? How about the floor?

Curmudgeon said...

Sex has always seemed to rather escape the attentions of the bansturbators, but the time had to, er, come eventually.

WV="agnes"

David Davis said...

Well, the bansturbators will still want sex, for themselves if not for other people. They will want to be able to shag their choice of the prettier daughters of the peasantry, on cold nights when the 2-mile-high icewall is only a few miles away, and the wind turbines have failed (again).

You'll be able to see the icewall, by moonlight. So clear, it will be, like icing sugar on a cake from the olden days.

Woman on a Raft said...

How does this fit with the presumed consent proposals? Are they really going to run round asking the grieving relatives not "may we swipe his corneas" but "did he shag around much, was he successful with the ladies...or the men?"

Even if the relatives say he was a model of celebacy so far as they know....how exactly do they know? Nobody really knows. I mean, look at Handycock. You wouldn't think that man was up to anything and yet it turns out that the hot Russian chics are all over him. Rather cruel, though, of the justice system to comment that this is "as unlikely as it seems".

Anyway, put him down as a stud muffin, according to Ms Legova. Dunno if anybody fancies a transplant of his dangly bits but they come with a little stamp of a Hammer and Sickle as a guarantee of quality. Rather like the little lion used to be on the eggs.

Woman on a Raft said...

I thought that looked wrong. It should be "celibacy" but I've been at the cooking sehrry. One for the pudden and one for me, one for the other pudden and another for mee. Did I haf one? Fogret. Betteer heve anth aonth athonthoer

Togine! lovely littl.e WV, I've missed you mwha mwah.

Dick Puddlecote said...

Well that's the end of that then. Bring such a rule in here and you'll be buggered for a transplant in many areas of UK cities.

If they bring in presumed consent though, it's a bloody fun way of getting out of it. :)

Anonymous said...

I haven't had any trim for coming on 3 years, and besides I'm getting burnt when I shuffle off so fuck 'em...

Anonymous said...

"two sexual partners in a YEAR ?"

LUCKY BASTARDS

Leg-iron said...

Timbone - Hospitals will be full of death and there will be no blood available. ...um... that was in last week's news.

I don't give blood any more either. Mine is full of nicotine and alcohol and fat and there is a danger it will spoil a drone and thereby spoil my fun. I derive immense enjoyment from those whose 'war on smokers/drinkers/etc' assumes the other side will not fight back and has no Lord Haw-Haw.

Haw Haw.

Leg-iron said...

WOAR - when the time comes I will add to my evil smoky-drinky ways with imaginary conquests which normal people, looking at me, wouldn't believe. The dopes believe anything. So not one organ will be donated.

Not that there'll be much worth having apart from the little underused bit anyway.

Slamlander said...

The Puritans are now streaming out of the woodwork. Is someone channeling Queen Victoria? Soon you guys will have to even begin covering table legs again ;)

Brits are such tools!

Kynon said...

I don't wish to know anything about your "gland" bursting, thank you very much! Filth! :P

WV: immat. I see what "ure" up to...

John Pickworth said...

I'm more than happy to donate my organ to as many people who will lay still long enough to receive it....

Actually, there's a pattern forming here that is leading me to conclude the BMA is employing ex-MOT inspectors rather than qualified doctors:

"I don't know Missus. Its sitting a bit low at the back-end, its drinking too much, the engine smokes and its clearly had a few bangs hasn't it?"

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