Saturday, 22 May 2010

Power up the Clegginator!

The Daily Tremble is a-buzz with what it calls 'Clegg's Power Grab'. No, it's not one of those funfair things, full of stuff nobody needs with the little crane that never catches a damn thing anyway. The Tremble is incensed that the Clegginator now has more authority than Count Mandelstein used to have.

They seem to have missed a detail or two.

The Clegginator is half of the Cleggeron. The left half. He and the Cameroid (the other left half) operate as independent beings except at full moon, when they combine, Transformer-like, into a ghastly multi-limbed creature that has the EU flag tattooed on its forehead. Sometimes, for variety, they turn into a truck instead. Biodiesel, naturally.

As the leader of the smaller half of the coalition, and as the Deputy Prime Monster, the Clegginator is supposed to be in on the workings of Government. It is, after all, his job.

Most of all, the one detail the Tremble glosses over in the interests of cheap sensationalist headlines... the Clegginator was elected.

Count Mandelstein was not only unelected, he was fired from Government three times and was still in charge. So I think it only right that the Clegginator exerts greater authority than Count Mandelstein ever did.

In a truly just world, the tea-boy would have had more authority than a thrice-disgraced nightspawn with the morals of Vlad the Impaler and the looks of a B-movie vampire. We haven't been living in a just world. I hope we are approaching one but I'll just have to wait and see.

I'm not holding my breath. Makes it hard to smoke.

3 comments:

Stewart Cowan said...

We will never live in a just world, because the elite won't allow it.

There will be justice and peace - Revelation chapter 21:

Revelation 21

1 And I saw a new heaven and a new earth: for the first heaven and the first earth were passed away; and there was no more sea.

2 And I John saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down from God out of heaven, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband.

3 And I heard a great voice out of heaven saying, Behold, the tabernacle of God is with men, and he will dwell with them, and they shall be his people, and God himself shall be with them, and be their God.

4 And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.

5 And he that sat upon the throne said, Behold, I make all things new. And he said unto me, Write: for these words are true and faithful.

6 And he said unto me, It is done. I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end. I will give unto him that is athirst of the fountain of the water of life freely.

7 He that overcometh shall inherit all things; and I will be his God, and he shall be my son.


But for the 'Righteous' and other unbelievers:

8 But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.

Justice will be done.

Lutney Chocker said...

Can we just stick to "Compo & Clegg"? It paints a picture...

...bathtub rolling down a hill.

Leg-iron said...

Lutney - I had them pegged as Foggy and Clegg.

Compo was the old tatty one.

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