Thursday 13 May 2010

It's not dead yet. Keep flogging.

Dammit.

A whole day in power and none of the new lot have done anything unutterably stupid yet. Not one. I could rely on Labour for at least one cock-up a day and sometimes a dozen or more.

They're still at it, too. The Strawman has made clear to any English voters who hadn't already realised it that his party doesn't consider them worth bothering about. Even though England contains most of the UK population, he insists that proper people wanted Labour.

Actually, Strawman, there are only two reasons for anyone to vote Labour. One, they are clinically insane or two, you bribed them with benefits or a non-job.

Mrs. Bucket has spoken up to insist that the Cameroid and the Clegginator install ministers on the basis of gender, race, and religion rather than on any ability to do the job. Because that's worked so well over the last thirteen years, hasn't it?

Prescott the Hut has been bragging about the number of civil service non-jobs Labour created because the layers of fat around his brain have caused it to overheat. He genuinely thinks it was a good thing to wreck the private sector and still make them pay for bin inspectors and duckpond police. Fortunately the current government plan to make some very deep cuts in the parasitic sector.

It's a good thing some of them are still around because this new lot seem to be taking the job seriously. They aren't likely to produce a lot of blog material for a while yet. I'll be watching, because they are antismokers so I don't like them.

Still, while they settle in, we will be able to amuse ourselves with Labour's leadership contest. So far it looks like it'll be between Moribund, Moribund the Younger, Cruddy and 'Sweaty' Balls, although Balls hasn't decided whether to try yet. Silly little socialists are already calling for a quick end to Tory rule. Not yet, benefits boys. First the pain, then the slow death.

So if the Cameroid does get the fixed-term parliament idea through, then the only way to shift him is with a vote of no confidence and that will need 55% support. Silly little socialists are already crying 'That's not fair' because they think we haven't noticed something.

The Scottish parliament needs 66% support for a vote of no confidence. Who set that level?

Why, it was the Liberal/Labour coalition that ran the place before Al the Oily Fish took over.

Careful now, DaNi. That idea rebounded on Scottish Labour. They can't now get Al's lot out. Set that figure too high and it could rebound on you in the future.

Oh, and if you could get someone to do something stupid but preferably harmless, it would be nice. Is Nadine busy at the moment?

I mean, you don't even have any really odd-looking ones and no easily twisted names apart from Vinnie the Wire. Give me something to work with here.

If they relaxed the smoking ban, you know, I'd be pretty much silenced. They won't though.

Even so, it's going to be hard to reach the heights of contempt inspired by the Brown Gorgon and his nosegoblins when the CCTV cameras start coming down, the databases are scrapped and the unaccountable start finding that they aren't any more.

They'll do something stupid soon. I have faith.

They are, after all, politicians.

8 comments:

hangemall said...

Re the coalition in general, it reminds me of the words of the old R&B song....
"Will you still love me tomorrow?"

I used to love those 60's songs. I think it something to do with the mini-dresses. But I'm revealing too much.

Back to the Balvenie Doublewood. Night night. Sweet nightmares.

WV = sailing. no fucking duff!

Leg-iron said...

Those minidresses didn't reveal quite enough for my tastes.

But then, I have mysoginistic tastes.

Balvenie Doublewood? My tastebuds burn with envy. Tesco had that on offer but there was never any on the shelf.

Which reminds me - best get some stock in before that VAT hike. Although as it's food, it really should be exempt.

Conan the Librarian™ said...

A whole day? They are still reading the manual, I'm sure they will get up to speed with the 79-97lot soon...

Hah, WV is calsk, what is your opinion on AI programmes hiding like gremlins within the net?

Or is it just an algorithm?

Leg-iron said...

I suppose they are too busy at the moment. The lunatic fringe in both parties is sure to kick off at any moment.

banned said...

Charming Dianne Abbot was on Radio 2 Thursday afternoon bemoaning the likely Labour leadership contenders;
"It's just the boys club back again..."

John Pickworth said...

"Even though England contains most of the UK population, he insists that proper people wanted Labour."

Clearly Straw went to the Gordon Brown School of Mathematical Excellence? He's forgetting that Scotland (or Northern Cornwall as I call it) contains around 5 million Scots, while the big bit of the UK below them holds around 15 million peoples of Scottish decent.

I'm sorry Jack but even all those 'proper people', the ones on benefits with no job, a brood of kids, SkyTV and a drug habit have realised that the money has run out.

Labour has done what it ALWAYS does... run out of other people's money.

Voting Labour should be a hate crime. As its not, I'll feel free to spit in the faces of those who even look like they might put a cross next to one of their future candidates.

As for the leadership thing, give it up guys. You got your workers's rights a hundred fucking years ago. Its time for you to go and for the Labour party to be buried alongside Communism and other flat-earth fancies that were later proven to be aberrations and outright nonsense.

JuliaM said...

"Prescott the Hut has been bragging about the number of civil service non-jobs Labour created..."

It would be really, really nice to think that all those non jobs will now dry up and blow away in the cold wind that's about to blow through the civil service, wouldn't it?

Anonymous said...

Cameron's warts are showing already, Leg-Iron. If the 55% rule doesn't bite him, euro-realists will.

He's not delivered a single thing he's promised (apart from leaving the EPP) - he says one thing, then does the opposite.

Today, he has just relinquished any hope of wearing a eurosceptic badge, by giving europhile Lidington the job that eurorealist Mark Francois has shadowed for years. Why?

I'm beginning to wonder if he wanted a hung parliament, so that he could go into coalition with the Lib Dems. Cam isn't exactly conservative.

The election was his to win - if he had the right policies. But his policies were liberal/socialist policies, dressed up in a haze of blue.

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