Tuesday 9 August 2011

Bits and pieces.

Some time ago I declared that I would never again be a blood donor and would never agree to organ donation. The trigger for this was an outbreak of stories about poor, put-upon antismokers whose lives had been saved by the use of filthy smoker organs.

They were alive, the smokers were dead, and in at least one case, the surviving creepy little git was only alive because of a smoker's donated lung. Yes, you read that right. Lung. So it's not true that BP get all the dead smokers' lungs to squeeze the tar out of them, nor is it true that councils can't fix potholes in the roads because there are fewer smokers to rip the raw materials out of. In fact, this particular smoker's lung was considered suitable for transplant by doctors. Lump free, and no blacker than the lungs of anyone who inhales on the average high street. Just like pretty much every other smoker's lung.

The ungrateful wretch poured insults on the donor, claiming that it was 'wrong' and 'evil' that their lives were saved by the use of such tainted goods. I get enough abuse while alive. I am not going to let it continue after I die. So, no organ donations and no blood either. I only have type O blood anyway so it's dead common. Nobody needs to worry about getting tobacco-scented and whisky-flavoured blood from me. I'm keeping it.

The fact is, I don't want those antismokers to live. They want to actively kill me, so why on Earth would I do anything at all to prolong their lives? If I could specify that any useable spare parts or blood could only be donated to smokers, I'd do it. I can make no such specification so all these bits will burn with me. The risk of my heart beating in a spite-filled antismoker chest is far too great. Cremation is the only safe option and I'll give off one last blast of second-hand smoke to scare the witless with their modern bogeyman. In fact, I'll have my body cavity stuffed with tobacco after death and specify a coffin lined with leaves from my garden.

That is, assuming tobacco growing hasn't been made illegal by then, which I fully expect to happen at any moment. The upside is that it's far less distinctive than cannabis and easy to grow indoors. Probably easier in fact, since today's bout of global warming has brought wind, rain, and temperatures that were below 10C most of the day. I have had to re-stake a few plants and close the vents on the greenhouse - in August!

We are told all this harassment is 'for the children'. Well, here are your children. Take a good long look. They are burning everything they can and are surrounded by more smoke than they could ever experience even if they lived in a 1970's pub. You aren't bothered about all that burning rubber and plastic, are you? No, the children are doing it so that's all okay. I won't be donating a lung to any of them and I certainly don't want theirs. They'll be modelling for cigarette packets in a few years.

Natascha Engel, Labour MP for North East Derbyshire, has been pretending to be contrite about her support of the smoking ban and is hoping her constituents will vote her back in so she can make caring noises and do bugger all about it as usual. I don't believe she is at all concerned about the people who voted for her. Not for a moment. All MPs of all parties care only for themselves. Remember, manifesto pledges are not binding in law. Not one word of any politician's promises can bind them. They say what they like to get votes and do what they like once they have them.

Australia is going for plain packaging and the spite-driven ones are ecstatic. I don't care. If all goes well, next year I'll be smoking stuff that has no packaging at all. The tobacco companies are upset about this but I doubt many smokers buy their smokes because of the pretty boxes. It will have no effect on smoking at all. Criminals will love the new easy-to-copy packets and children will be intrigued by the mysterious boxes in a way no advertising could ever achieve.

Sod the tobacco companies. They don't care about their customers as long as they make a profit. They don't care if we travel halfway across Europe to buy tobacco, their profit is the same wherever we buy it. Only the tax changes. It's even the same if we get it from Man with a Van because he's bought it abroad. They don't care if UKBA steal it all when we get back because they still have the profit and then we'll just have to buy some more. They don't care if we are treated as lepers because they're still getting their money. Don't look to the tobacco companies for support. They regard us as nothing more than a source of income - just like the government, ASH and the Pharmers. All the same.

In fact, when it comes to the inevitable ban on growing tobacco, I'll bet the tobacco companies will be right there at the front of the line with some made-up story about how the stuff they haven't added chemicals to is somehow more dangerous.

Soon the noose will get even tighter and not just the smoking one either. These people want total control over every aspect of your life, and they are not going to stop until they get it. What will you do? Vote them out? That's going to be a little difficult because you never voted them in. They are not answerable to you. You are expected to answer to them. Do as you are told, your life is not yours.

You antismokers think you have 'the right to fresh air'? You have no rights at all. You are organ donors so you must keep your organs pristine. No smoking or drinking or excess fat. Exercise every day. Why do you think they want that DNA database? Makes you all so much easier to find when it's time to repay those university loans.

From DickP's article, hear the voice of the unelected who are your masters -

We now have three weeks and three days to tell member states loud and clear that we expect them to respect the right to health of the people they represent. They need to hear that we are angry at these delays and expect them to get serious and reach consensus on time-bound commitments to action.

They are angry.

They have no idea what that word means.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

LI, I wouldn't think of ever donating my tar-ridden blood again, as for my hopefully utterly fecked organs, they are going in the big furnace, with a Government approved "These are No Smoking premises... etc" stuck on the lid.

Then into the cremulator.

Then forwarded to ASH Scotland to be scattered in their garden of remembrance.

Also I find it very funny the kids ransacking shit stores like JB Sports just to keep their hoodies up to date, they can't really think that will sell down the pub like a junkie selling steaks?

Woodsy42 said...

I'll think you will find that while growing your own tobacco is legal (as are other plants that manufacture nicotine)curing it and smoking itis not - unless you assess the weight and pay the duty. You are of course doing that, just as I intend to. (but I may forget my memory isn't what it was) :-)

George Speller said...

Problem is, as far as I can see, somebody has to prove that it's smokeable. Which govt busybody would do that? Tee hee.

Leg-iron said...

Anon - I'd like my ashes thrown into Dreadful Arnott's face, where they can cause forty-seventh hand something or other.

Of course, that would have no real effect, so I'd like them mixed with anthrax first.

Woodsy42 - if I get to that stage, I'm not likely to owe enough duty to cover their petrol costs to come and check. They can come and check if they like but if I have two ounces to show them it'll be the best I'll admit to.

George S - there's bound to be a duff batch in there somewhere for them to try ;) Perhaps the batch that fell into the drain cleaner...

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