Saturday 18 June 2011

Children influenced by adults?

Well who'd have thought it?

Lord Longrider and the Duke of Puddlecote have already covered the astounding ability of modern science to actually notice that which has been right in front of everyone else's eyes all the time. Next time, include a few windows in that ivory tower, and let the researchers look through them once in a while. It'll save a lot of bother.

Science has realised at last that those parents who don't give a damn about their children tend to produce nasty little scroats, while those who apply discipline and caring tend to produce well-brought-up and actually worthwhile human beings. My grandmother would have had words to describe these scientists, and she wasn't shy about using those words. She also wasn't shy about whacking any grandchild who used them, and we couldn't do a damn thing about it because when she used them, she did it in Welsh. It was years before we even knew she was swearing at us.

Well, science has more to do yet. Now they are fretting about the mystery of why ten-year-old boys are so obsessed with their weight that they are becoming bulimic. Why those children, who are not at all obese, are being bullied for not being stick-thin.

Maybe one day they will make the connection with the health freaks' obsession with BMI to the extent that perfectly normal children are being sent home with a letter saying 'You are fat'. Maybe one day they will realise that this bulimia isn't just some random outbreak, but has been carefully nutured and instilled into those children by all the health Nazis, and drummed into each and every child in every school.

Your child might not look fat, but computer says 'fat' so he's fat. We've informed the school and all his friends, who have promised not to bully him or harass him or call him 'Tubbo' or attempt to roll him like a barrel. They swore a solemn oath with their fingers crossed, which is their culture, innit?

Even the Daily Mail commenters have spotted it. Well, the lesser froth-mouthed Mail commenters have spotted it.

When, I wonder, will science? And if they do realise that they are responsible for this in the first place, will they ever admit it?

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

I loved the "you can make your kids drunkards" nonsense. A much more profitable study is how wives drive their husbands to drink.

Anonymous said...

Nothing to do with science and everything to do with nudge, nudge, nudging.

Oldrightie said...

It seems the killjoys have won completely. Happiness is to be made a thought crime, presumably.

Anonymous said...

My doctor told me I was 'obese', which you'd think was odd if you saw me. I don't even count as obese on an NHS online BMI calculator.

I didn't find out until later that apparently, GPs get extra money for treating 'obese' patients.

sixtypoundsaweekcleaner said...

Your GP thinks you're obese? Blimey, I wonder what he'd think of me?

My GP hasn't said anything about my weight, but he once asked me how much I drank and when I told him about 3 bottles of wine a week, he almost had heart failure!

Apparently, that is way too high and I'm virtually an alcoholic. Perhaps he gets extra dosh for that too?

Same Anonymous as above said...

@sixtypoundsaweekcleaner - a few months ago I heard about a guy (from one of his friends) who is supposed to get £10 a day to help pay the costs of his alcohol addiction. So the free money is certainly being hosed about.

Anonymous said...

Perhaps sooner or later children will be required to sit a 'well being examination'as part of the national curriculum. The practical aspect of this would be to be prove abstinence by submitting to random drug, alcohol and cotinine tests. Such requirements are already compulsory in some workplaces, so why not in schools?

Pogo said...

SaoT. "A woman drove me to drink... And I never had the courtesy to thank her!" (W. C. Fields)

:-)

nisakiman said...

"...and when I told him about 3 bottles of wine a week, he almost had heart failure! "

This business about "recommended levels" is the same old bullshit. I drink a bottle of red a day, plus a couple of beers. According to the health Nazis, I'm a hopeless alcoholic. And yet I don't drink during the day when I'm working (7 days a week normally), and come 6ish when I finish, I'll sit down and crack the first drink of the day. Maybe I'm wrong, but to me that is not alcoholism. As far as I'm concerned, I just enjoy a drink in the evening. Whatever, I have no intention of changing my way of life. The health fanatics can take their recommended levels and stick them up their collective arse. I'm probably fitter than any of them will be at my age anyway.

Peter S. said...

Here here, nisakiman. I have the same sort of work/drink regime as you, I enjoy it to the full and anyone who tries to tell me otherwise gets an ear-full. Cheers to you and all other like-minded commenters her - and to our ferropedal host as well, of course.

Anonymous said...

"...and when I told him about 3 bottles of wine a week, he almost had heart failure! "

Pity you didn't say 3 bottles a day and finish the bastard off.
Doctors are one of the lowest forms of life in my opinion - it is their endorsement that allows the health nazis to trot out their nonsense.

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