Saturday, 4 December 2010

Don't shout!


I went to the bank and post office today. Here's someone at the cashpoint, and if their balance is zero, they'd better be fast on their feet. No shouting, because the Icicle of Damoclese is waiting there.

These are everywhere now and I'm surprised nobody has been impaled yet. My neighbour's guttering has collapsed and I suspect mine might be next.

Global warming - it's really worth the taxes and all the cost of flying the hoon Huhne to Mexico, isn't it?

13 comments:

Trooper Thompson said...

That's the only good thing about Cancun - the amount of CO2 it will spew into the atmosphere. Hopefully this will help stave off the ice age we're due.

JuliaM said...

Our building yesterday was tannoy'ing messages to beware on entering & exiting as snow and ice was falling from the roof...

Woman on a Raft said...

If Huhne were to stay in Mexico and not get back, that would possibly be worth the money.

Dave H. said...

Fortunately global warming has reached us down South: the snow's all but gone and we're basking outside at a sweaty 1.7°C.

BTW today's Graun (yes, I know) has an article on whether places further North cope any better with freezing weather. Many report that, whatever other measures they take, falling ice remains a major killer.

Interestingly, one of the places listed was Moscow. As I recall, it's at almost exactly the same latitude as Glasgow. This a) explains why you are so cold now and b) ought to be a slight source of worry because a Trident wouldn't have to get so many dials wrong in order to hit you by mistake.

So if it suddenly becomes very bright and warm up there I can only say sorry in advance.

Anonymous said...

I have noticed a few icicles like this.

Anonymous said...

Cancun cunts.

Anonymous said...

If I was impaled by one of those I'd take the bank to the fucking cleaners.

They'd argue it was "an act of God", I'd reply I'm a atheist so fucking cough it up cunt...

I think I'll go and stand under a cashline now.

Anonymous said...

Shouldn't elf and safety be knocking those icicles down using some highly paid experts trained in the science of safe icicle removal? Or no, maybe not, as they're hoping to wait and see if a few of them won't take out "the smokers" standing out by the doorways which government hates these days and why they don't care if any of them fall. Or maybe there is no trained experts for removing icicles as they've all bought into globaloney warming and don't believe icicles are really happening. Hope they fall off council's front door and hits them in the head.

Chief_Sceptic said...

I've live in S.W. Norway for some 13 years now - it's become colder every fucking year ...

And yet, we STILL get the Politicians "bleating" about Global Warming ! ...

Wouldn't it be nice, if some of our 'Lords and Masters' had an IQ of more than 85 ? ...

Leg-iron said...

Death by icicle - the perfect murder beckons.

The murder weapon simply melts away...

Anonymous said...

I read an article recently, written by an encouragingly sceptical journalist, that it was interesting how, although we’ve all had the doom-sayers’ predictions pummelled into us relentlessly about the dire effects of global warming, no-one has yet carried out any research into the possible benefits of global warming – with the lack of injuries caused by falls in the snow and ice (not to mention “death by falling icicle” as illustrated here), lower heating requirements = lower energy consumption and, of course, lower CO2 emissions, more people walking places rather than driving everywhere because it’s too f*cking cold to get from A to B any other way, less need for people to jet off to sunny climes for a bit of holiday warmth, cited as just a few.

Not to mention the fact that it has been since the end of the last ice age that sea levels rose sufficiently for the British Isles to become separated from mainland Europe. And a bit more water between us and them seems to me to be an extremely good idea!

banned said...

Nearby is a cashpoint in the wall of what used to be a bank. It is very popuilar with students as it is located between one of their residencies and the town centre.
At 10pm precisely the hanging flower basket above gets its automated watering; good laugh every time (I'll have to check out its icicle potential).

Robert the Biker (in his Jeep) said...

There was about eight inches of global warming down my lane and the B road, extended into Tunbridge Wells, up the A21 and right round the M25. Diid I whine and bleat? No, I merely pulled the renge selector lever on my newly purchased cheap(thanks ebay) jeep back two notches into fwd and drove through. I bought it just over a week ago and it's already paid for itself by getting me into London to work. Had lots of icicles on the gutters but they've all fallen off now, woke me up with the crash.

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