Bela Lugosi plays the lead role in the forthcoming film 'Union of Vampires', with Christopher Lee as Count Mandelstein and a decade's collection of white dog-turds as The Lump of Stuff in the PM's Chair.
(Picture exsanguinated from here.)
(Picture exsanguinated from here.)
I didn't photoshop those teeth. Those are his real ones, just starting to protrude as the sun goes down. That's Charlie, one of Mandelstein's 'Cheeeldren of ze night', head politico of the union that is bringing the Brown Gorgon's government into disrepute while simultaneously funding their election campaign.
It makes no sense. If the union wants the Gorgon to win, why are they wrecking the Easter plans of thousands of people who will then blame the government for not doing something about it? And why make it harder for the Gorgon to get re-elected while simultaneously paying for it?
Why doesn't Unite sit quietly until after the election and then kick up the crap? It's only a matter of weeks away.
“With many of our members working shifts we’re also asking you to make sure as many of our members register for a postal vote.”
Well, far be it from me to suggest that the union reps might be helping members with those postal votes, or collecting them for posting, or anything illegal like that. No, I think Charlie has missed the point. He's been doing too much spinning and has made himself dizzy.
The number of people passing through or hoping to pass through airports over Easter far exceeds the number of people striking in those airports. Even if, by some strange coincidence, every one of those postal votes turned out to be a vote for old Saggy-Face and his party of poopers, the number of people Charlie has enraged in order to achieve this is much greater.
Especially those who have had to save up to afford all Labour's extra taxes on flying.
And those who have had to travel a long way to get to the airport.
And those who have been looking forward to this break for a long time.
And those who, in the recession, know that this break might be the last one they can afford for the foreseeable future.
And those who have already endured the nudie scanner only to be told their flight is cancelled and they can go home after sitting for six hours drinking beer and their car is parked in the car park and now they can't drive it...
Charlie Wheeliebin doesn't care about those people. He is concentrating on making sure all his members vote for Labour United. It does not occur to him for a moment that some of those people whose trips he has cancelled might be his members. It does not occur to him how many shellsuit, Burberry hat and sovereign ring wearers might be left disappointed this Easter. No, he doesn't care at all about anyone but himself and he has absolutely zero ability to consider the consequences of his actions. Perfect Labour party material.
“We’ve been in touch for the last year or so with Unite members in the key parliamentary marginals. We’ve asked them their voting intentions and what issues matters to them."
You what? Since when was it the business of any union to know what their members' voting intentions are? For what possible reason could this union need that information?
Charlie says: "That has led to a dialogue to firm up Labour support.”
In other words, if they said they weren't going to vote Labour, Charlie's people pressured them until they said they would.
Unite is not a union. It is a cult. With the substitution of a single letter, so is Charlie.
You get into that union and you WILL vote Labour. No matter what you want or think you want, the cult overlords will persuade you and bully you and oppress you and harangue you until you are thinking in the way you are told to think.
If you are in that union and you are pressured to take a postal vote, decline. Vote in person. It is the only way to be sure that your vote isn't tampered with. If you cannot resist the postal vote pressure, fill it in and post it yourself as soon as it arrives, before the Unite cult come around to 'help' with it.
If you are in that union and you have been harangued into saying you are going to vote Labour, keep saying it. In the polling station, no-one can see you vote. Say you voted Labour to the exit pollsters. Where that X really went, nobody will ever know.
If you are a Labour voter, you are actually a Unite voter. They run the party you think you're voting for. There is no Labour party now. There is only the union. A vote for Labour is a vote for strikes and for support only for those union members. The rest of us? They are not interested.
If you want that vampiric face above grinning at you from huge posters all over the country, if you want to wake up every day not knowing whether there will be a bus or a train running, if you want to be dictated to by an elite who you didn't think were even up for election, if you want to be forced to pay union dues even if you are out of work, then vote Labour.
If you don't want to live a Soviet lifestyle, vote for someone else. Anyone else.