Sunday, 14 November 2010

Rudolph the Dead Roast Reindeer.

We have a recently-opened Lidl in town. All I have sampled there so far are Glen Orchy and Hunter's Glen. I have not yet ventured further than the whisky section although I note they sell Lambrusco. Remember that stuff? I thought it had faded away.

I'll have to explore further because it seems they are selling something I have not tried before. Reindeer meat. I'll pick up a bottle of Glen Orchy while I'm there, to have alongside Santa's drive unit, with chips. It could turn out to be this year's Christmas lunch. With a little red hat on top and a side order of deep-fried elves in batter. So if Santa doesn't make it to your house this year, you'll know he passed mine first.

They're not really Santa's reindeer, kids. His can fly, remember? You can't catch them with a snowmobile.

You need high powered rifles for those.


The best part of the hyped-up horror in the Mail is that alongside the tale of terrible hunters chasing Santa's little pets for food, they've put a recipe. They really need a sober editor, I think.

19 comments:

sixtypoundsaweekcleaner said...

Irish authorities today uncovered a mass grave of dead snowmen. Further tests revealed it was actually a field of carrots.

Pavlov's Cat said...

It's just venison surely? and isn't that a low fat 'good' meat.

Worst/Best date I ever had was I took a girl I really liked, to my favourite restaurant (at the time) Rules
Looking forward to a good meal I probably didn't pay as much attention to my companion as I should.

So the waiter asked 'Are you ready to order?"

I replied "Yes, I'll have the Fois Gras on apple gratin, then the wild Roe Deer"

At which point my date stood up, declared "I'm a Vegetarian and you disgust me" chucked her napkin at me and left

The meal was fantastic by the way

Anonymous said...

horrible shop would never shop there

- Linda Burt, reading uk, 14/11/2010 15:07

Na, Linda only gets hers from M&S and her her dolphin chunks at Waitrose.

subrosa said...

Tesco have been selling high quality venison steaks for a couple of years now. They're not the Tesco label (I never buy meat with that) but a quality Scottish company produces them. 2 minutes in the Foreman grill, leave to stand a minute. Absolutely lovely with some redcurrant jelly.

Pavola's cat - The date couldn't have been up to much if you stayed to enjoy the meal.:)

Leg-iron said...

I have the George Formby grill. Plays the ukelele while cooking and sings 'When I'm grilling pork chops'.

Richard said...

Blog title of the month. Very good.

Anonymous said...

Give it a go LI its bloody good grub. I lived in Norway and Sweden for years and its very common.

JuliaM said...

"It's just venison surely? and isn't that a low fat 'good' meat."

It's lean, pure protien and free-range. What's not to like?

I'm heading to the first Lidl I can find next weekend - springbok steaks too, according to that article! I've never eaten springbok.

It's my goal in life - to eat as many game animals as I can...

Chapcustard said...

When serving Rudolph up as Christmas dinner be sure to top the meat with a large roasted tomato and watch the kids scream.

Additonal festive nightmares can be induced by passing the brussel sprouts off as Elf gonads, bread sauce as Santa vomit and tell them the mincemeat in the mince pies is made from the offal of the children who stayed awake to see if Santa exists.

Oh and brandy butter could easily be....OK, I think that's enough.

Chuckles said...

Source of the meat -

http://www.christmas-jokes.info/images/rudolph-reindeer-revenge.jpg

View from the Solent said...

".. a recently-opened Lidl in town"
You are blessed. Venture further into the food section. If it's anything like the store in my locality you will find many interesting items from mainland sources. My diet has changed since I started shopping there.

Anonymous said...

Ooh, be careful it isn't a nice bubbly beer-batter on those elves.

Joe Public said...

I love the Marketing Bod's wheeze of labeling Tuna as caught in 'Dolphin Friendly' nets.

They're not very friendly to the effin tuna, are they?

Pavlov's Cat said...

@Subrosa
The date couldn't have been up to much if you stayed to enjoy the meal.:)

She was actually, but it was a first date anyway and after carefully weighing up the pro's and con's felt I would have to work too hard to get a 'save' out of it. So decided on the lovely Bambi with a cranberry jus.

Plus she was a vegatarian (not that they are not lovely people, I'm sure) it would never have worked

Richard said...

I'm a vagitarian, me.

Nomine said...

what ahuge grin that and all the comments has put on my face LI brill, Im off to find a lidl a wonderful lidl because...

moriarty said...

According to the Lidl pamphlet I have here, they also have ostrich and springbok steaks too this year. Reindeer does sound more 'christmassy', but at £17/kg I think I'll give it a miss.

Generally I quite like the kraut supermarkets, but sometimes I do wish they'd sell baccy too.

Leg-iron said...

It's expensive but then so is posh steak. It's not an everyday thing.

If sirloin was cheap enough to have every day, it wouldn't be a treat. I don't intend to become a regular reindeer nosher but I have to give it a go. Springbok too. Ostrich has been available around here for a while but it's just big chicken. The parson's nose could feed a family.

Some of the stuff I tried in China would make haggis-eaters retch. Some of the things I ate while penniless would make even the Chinese wince. If it's dead and not too rotten, it's edible.

My immune system is the Terminator now. It's met everything and killed them all. Little muscle-bound white cells with sunglasses and serious faces.

Except 'kissing disease'. I've never had that.

The mirror knows why.

Anonymous said...

wonder what they would thnk of our butcher then,among other delights he sells Zebra steaks.

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