Monday, 10 May 2010

Brain damage.

Well, actually it's about damage to a guy's bag of lumps but since most women think we keep our brains in there anyway...

It's not quite true, ladies, we have another brain in there that takes control while the main brain is saying 'Gah' and drooling at you.

Apparently males are becoming less fertile and the entire human race will be extinct within a couple of generations. Sort of makes the whole 'global warming' thing and the 'hit by an asteroid' worry pale into irrelevance, doesn't it? No need to worry about education, there won't be anyone to educate in a century from now and as for teen pregnancy, well it simply cannot be happening unless the last remaining fertile male is a human tomcat.

There are six billion people on this planet. A drop in fertility is not a bad thing. Really. Even if it was real, which the exponential population increase seems to suggest it isn't.

If it is happening, can we please shut up now about energy use, peak oil and global warming and all the rest of it? None of that is going to happen if our peckers all dry up. Even if it does, there won't be anyone here to see it.

Guess who's to blame?

Factors such as women eating a lot of beef during pregnancy - which means they have consumed a diet rich in polycyclic aromatic hydrocarbons (PAHs) that are potentially damaging chemicals -

Red meat. Ooooo, never, surely? Not the stuff the Righteous have been trying to make us stop eating for years? What a coincidence.

to the issue of obesity during pregnancy

Obesity is to blame here too? Another coincidence!

and a woman's exposure to smoke,

Well, that particular coincidence had to come. So even though smoking is now banned in all public places, smokers can be refused jobs simply because they are smokers, and smoking prevalence is around 20-25% or less whereas in the years before the 1960's baby boom it was over 90%... smoking causes infertility. It says so on the packets but don't worry guys because other packets say it causes impotence so infertility doesn't matter. Don't let the facts get in the way - far fewer smokers and increased infertility can only mean smoking is to blame. We're not alone on this one though. This is a real Righteous lie-fest.

pesticides, traffic fumes, plastics and even soya beans are all thought to have a bearing on a male foetus's future fertility.

Pesticides must be banned and all food grown organic, beetle-ridden and covered in fungus. Traffic fumes - hey drivers, you're on the block again. Plastics are not Green and you have to run a computer with a raffia-woven casing and go back to the iron kettle on the hob for your tea. Soya beans are a new one. Something to do with soya production being in the hands of big business these days, perhaps?

The Daily Terror even has a case study of an unfortunate infertile man and it can't simply be because...

My mother took Thalidomide for morning sickness. When the scandal broke in 1962, GPs offered free abortions, but my mother was too far gone by two weeks.'

Unlike the majority of Thalidomide babies, Karl was born seemingly healthy. But he has suffered from asthma since birth.

As thalidomide cases go, getting out of it with asthma and infertility is a big lottery win. Many of those thalidomide children would have given their right stump to have been born only with asthma and infertility. It is a shame he is infertile but when you look at what could have been, he was damn lucky.

He is also around 48 now which is a time when male fertility is hardly at its peak anyway. It might not even be the thalidomide.

And yet he is a father due to IVF. So he wasn't firing blanks, he just had shells with fewer than average pellets. He's not even a real case of infertility!

The whole story is scaremongering at its best and the best part is, a moment's thought shows it to be self-repairing scaremongering.

If fertility declines, the population goes down. Less pollution, less oil use, less pesticide use because there'd be no need for high yields, less smoking, less of everything that's claimed to cause these problems. Then fertility can recover and here we go again.

I think this one smacks of real desperation. The end of this round of Righteousness can't be far away now.


The Boggart said...

There is one Elephant in the room so to speak (which the Righteous ignore) and that is I have had plenty of oppotunities to 'impregnate' females there is no shortage where I live, I choose not to fall into the slave trap.
This trap involves a few hours of pleasure (if lucky) and a lifetime thereafter of paying for it through child sipport & taxes.
No thanks, some of us think with our 'upper' brains not lower
but the right on will never see it this way.
Fertility declining? Or Male Savvy increasing?

Leg-iron said...

There might be an element of increased male wariness in there too, as far as single couplings are concerned.

There have been a hell of a lot of false rape accusations lately.

For married couples, a general knackeredness after spending all day trying to earn enough for that day's bills might well cover it.

Junican said...

I read something similar not long ago. I may have been in the DT.

There is a truth that 'dare not speak its name'. Something that no one is talking about, and that is 'population explosion'.

Is there any need to say more?

Well, yes there is.

There is a contradiction inherent in Western economic thinking, and that is that there is a need for population growth in order to achieve economic growth. But population growth produces more energy needs and therefore produces more environmental damage, if that is indeed true.

There is a catch 22 involved here somewhere, but I am not clever enough to see it in sufficient detail.

Maybe our new MPs will see it, but I doubt it. I doubt it because it seems to be true that the wives/husbands who acted as Secretaries for their spouses could not even run a simple spreadsheet in order to control their spouses' expenses. That is the real scandal, and it has been avoided somehow. Why is it that the incompetence of Secretaries has been avoided? These questions need to be asked and be answered. Wht did MP so-and-so think that his wife was competent to be his secretary on £30 grand per an when she could not even run his expenses account? These questions must now simply be allowed to go away because we have been relying on these people to run our country on the understanding that they are capable. They must have capable secretaries and be capable of reading and understanding the legislation which they pass.

It is true that we need a new politics in this country. We must prove that it is correct that we are the home of democracy. Whenever and whatever proposition or Bill comes before Parliament, every MP should say, on the internet, that he has read the Bill, understands it, and either supports it or does not.

The modern world has changed. Each individual MP is responsible for every decision of Parliament. Every constituant has a reasonable right to know why his MP has voted in a particular way.

Mark Wadsworth said...

Agreed, it is a load of shit. Yer average bloke could get a woman pregnant every day (if the circumstances were right :P), so if this goes down to only once every two days or once a week, I doubt it would have much impact on birth rates.

Pogo said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Pogo said...

I don't see how "they" can, with a straight face, claim that smoking or alcohol causes infertility... The teenage, chavette baby-factories seem to manage to knock out feral sprogs at a frightening rate whilst living on a diet of Lambert & Butler and White Lightning. :-)

The Underdoug said...

@Pogo: The teenage, chavette baby-factories seem to manage to knock out feral sprogs at a frightening rate whilst living on a diet of Lambert & Butler and White Lightning...

Perhaps men are not involved in the above. In true Jurassic Pork fashion, nature has found a way...

Antipholus Papps said...

Jurassic Pork

Hot dino-porn action! No infertility for the smoke-free raptors!

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