Not actually fake stats, not like those used by the antismokers, antidrinkers, antieverything lot. These are a perfect example of stupid stats, where the link between cause and effect needs a descriptive word which is about five levels below 'tenuous', and yet it's reported in all seriousness.
If your name is Colin, you're going to die.
Whether you smoke or not, whether you drink or not, whether you like salt and fat and have an allergy to vegetables or not, if your name is Colin then you'd best get it changed pronto. You know, I can only think of one zombie film in which the zombie has a name. This one. Seriously, Colin, get down the town hall and change that name tomorrow, and stay away from piano deliveries to upper floors in the meantime.
It's an incredible article, very funny indeed until you get to this bit:
Men called Colin, Brian and Alan have a 47 per cent chance of having high blood pressure according to the survey commissioned by Lloyd's Pharmacy.
Someone paid for this. Someone actually thought this survey up and paid someone else to do it. That someone-else took the job and actually did the survey. Then they published a report on the results.
I turn down crap jobs. I could just take the money and write a report but I don't want my name on a crap job. It won't help me get decent work in the future. Really, what sort of 'expert' wants to be associated with something like this?
Modern science. Sometimes I despair.