Shark jumper supreme.

I make no apology for last night's rage. It has not abated.

After reading those accounts of antismokers the Captain had encountered, something became blindingly clear to me.

Paedophiles now think they are morally superior to smokers. So do people who crap themselves in public and either don't know or don't care. We are accosted and berated by kiddie fiddlers and trouser-fillers and they regard us as lower than them.

And the antismokers agree.

ASH did this. Labour did this. The Cleggeron Coagulation continue to do this. The Snide and Nasty Party keep the oppression going in Scotland and Prawn Curry would, if they had power, make it far, far worse in Wales. They have placed our social status lower than a cockroach and they are charging us for the privilege!

Paedos don't have to pay compensation to their victims. They get sentences that amount to "You're a naughty boy. Don't get caught doing it again" and they pay no child molestation tax. The exploding backsides of the posteriorly careless (how's that for political correctness?) attract no stench tax and no eye-horrifying tax. They are Approved. Yes, paedos are approved. Just look at the sentencing, compared to a landlord who allowed smoking in his pub.

There is no other response to this than rage. There is no way to sit back and say "Well, it's not so bad" because the fact is, it could only be worse if we were required to be licenced like dogs. Which has, incidentally, already been considered.

The Ciggiebusters were accused of 'jumping the shark', as were the 10:10 eco-jihadis with their blowing up of anyone who disagrees with their religion. Not opposing, just disagreeing. They really still can't see what everyone was so angry about with that, you know. To them, casual detonation of people they don't like is funny. At least the terrorists regard it as serious.

But this, this new social placement where even paedos and the stained trouser brigade consider us lower than them, this is Olympic standard Great White vaulting with a double backflip and pike in mid-air, while filling the Spandex with the warm stickiness within and debasing a child upon landing. They'll probably allow that at the Olympic Games in That London, but they won't allow smoking.

This one is going to rouse even the most complacent of Smoky-Drinkers this weekend. I have printouts of the Captain's account to pass around so that those who have no internet connection - the venue this weekend doesn't even have a landline - can see what the Liberal Democrat who currently holds this part of the country thinks of them. And what his SNP competitor, as well as Oily Al himself, the MSP, thinks of them. What Labour and the Greens think of them. What the Conservatives think of them. Standing outside the pub is going to seem utterly trivial compared to this.

I won't be collecting the printouts at the end. They are to be left in pubs and passed along to their friends. This post will be on the pages too, just to be sure the full import of the message is clear.

Oh, and if you think my personal dislike of children is in any way comparable to this, perhaps you'd prefer the antismokers who like children, a little more than could be considered decent?

Consider this - If someone attacked you with a stick, you took the stick from them, broke it and gave it back in a form they could no longer use to harm you, would you think of that as a good thing?

Why then do you think I would act differently when you attack me with a child? I will never use any physical violence against a child but psychological attacks, well, I'm good at those with adults. I can break an adult's mind with words. Children are far more susceptible.

What's that, antismoker? Moral responsibility? Oh, but you have placed me lower than paedophiles and sewage-wearers.

What do you expect?