Nodded off for a few hours there. It'll happen periodically while I'm off nicotine, fortunately my working hours are currently random and can be dealt with just as well in the middle of the night. Electrofag usage is still low. It might be more if I didn't already know it was nicotine-free. No matter, there's no sign of panic or terrible cravings so all is well. So far.
Anyway. The 'gosh-I am-so-suprised' news today is that Cameron's fuel duty adjustment idea was another load of bollocks from the Arnold-Daley-used-car-salesman we allowed to become Prime Monster. So far, what do we have from the Coagulation? A promise of an EU referendum which was as real as Labour's, a promise to listen to people that was censored and finally deleted, a Great Repeal Bill that was lies, a promise on immigration that was lies, a promise on restricting the EU robbery that was lies, a promise on no more powers to Brussels that was lies (including another referendum promise that was lies), and more control over the minutiae of our lives.
What the hell happened to that promise of an end to the war on motorists? This is what they really meant - not so much an end, more a final solution.
We still have all that green investment in windmills that haven't moved in two months and solar power in a country that doesn't get enough sun in winter to run garden lights, we are still being taxed to the eyeballs for heating even though it's the coldest winter for a hundred years and crabs and even penguins are dying in the cold, we still have antismoking teetotal average waist size enforcement officers in councils while binmen are told to take pay cuts, we are still being ordered to eat as directed, children are still learning about organic fairtrade mung bean growing and how we are all evil because we're not black, and they are coming out of school filled with PC but unable to spell it.
They also no longer count on their fingers. They can't. They can't learn how many they have because some people might be missing one or two and having ten is elitist.
No wonder people vote BNP. I mean, look at them and ask yourself - could they possibly be any worse than what we have? Vlad the Impaler wouldn't be worse. At least he wasn't two-faced. When he hated you he didn't mince around making promises he had no intention of keeping. No, he rammed a pole up your jacksi and left you on it. I'm sure we can find 650 ten-foot poles somewhere.
The Coagulation feel they can do what they like and why? Well, look at the alternative. Moribund the Burgemeister and his gang of drooling imbeciles, including Kerry 'I can haz yr DNA' McCarthy. So we have the option to swap one load of drooling, dishonest imbeciles for another. That, after all, is all we did last time.
The Cameroid wants IPSA to back off from his lads while they are at the trough, meanwhile the police have started jailing the filthy wasters and Cameroid's token blonde bimbo, Nadine Dorries, has found time among her caseload to shag a married man. And to get herself in the papers slagging off his wife. Who is right and wrong in that matter is none of my business but for an MP to slate her married lover's wife in the newspapers is beyond the pale. She won't be sacked. No matter what they do, the party pats them on the shoulder and lets them carry on.
At some point soon we will have another King Charles and a Parliament filled with corruption and self-serving, vile, reprehensible scum who believe themselves above the law and who delight in making up stupid laws just to make life difficult for the proles while stealing the pennies from dead men's eyes. We've been here before.
No wonder they don't want history taught in schools. Who knows how to form the Nu-New Model Army? Should we start at Naseby or Marston Moor this time?
The Tories can unseat a leader in moments. If they don't do it soon, they won't have a vote left in the country.
As for the Lib Dems, well, they're finished already. Labour? If they ever get back into Parliament I'll hire one of those cars with loudspeakers and tour the town playing the theme from 'Dawn of the Living Dead'.
Actually, the local chavs have Corsas with sound systems that could do a better job and they'd probably do it for a case of Stella. They can't be politically motivated but they could be antipolitically motivated... hmm.
Thatcher once famously said 'The lady's not for turning'.
Adopted Son of Thatcher, actually the son of Mr. Blobby and a bucket of warm gunk after a particularly drug-fuelled Noel's House Party, isn't just for turning.
He's for spinning.
Get him the hell out of there, Tories. Or you won't have a Tory party in five years.
You'll be the Torywhiglabour party. And you will have five seats if you're lucky.
This country has had enough.