Chris Evans has been found, dressed as a cat, on a ferry bound for Spain and was immediately returned by the Spanish.
Despite the protestations of his owner, a Mr. Wogan, that the hyperactive fleabag should be subject to six months of quarantine in Spain with a pack of rabid dogs, the Spanish response was to put him on a ferry straight back to the UK. Staff checked his room every hour to make sure he was still in it.
Border agency guards waved him through from behind soundproof screens. The Spanish authorities released a statement denouncing the BBC for attempting to dispose of toxic wasters in their country and claimed that if they ever try to send either of the Brand constructions, they can bloody well swim back.
Mr. Wogan has resigned his job and gone into hiding.